So, how do I spend my first day of VACATION? Well, I talked to Jon on facebook for a while. Enjoy talking to people about issues with REASONABLE tone in our voices. And now… I blog..
Today, I blog about the word BULLY… When I hear the word “bully,” I see the douche on the playground pushing the smaller / weaker child down. I see a cartoonish figure. I see an IDIOT. My point: “bully” is becoming a word equated to “awesome.”
“Awesome” used to be “awesome.” A doctor successfully completed a heart transplant surgery = AWESOME. A “fire-person” running into a burning home and saving a life = AWESOME! Now, a song? A song can be “awesome.” The movie was “awesome.” “Awesome” is just another word equating to very cool or very good. “Awesome” has lost it’s “awesomeness.”
“Bully” … Bully is a cartoon figure.
Instead of “bully,” how about using the word “Mean?” When I say to my students, “How come you are being mean?” Their face contorts. Their hurtful / disrespectful actions are “mean.” Do this for me, please, say “How come you are bullying?” and now say, “How come you are being mean?” Again, I am not attempting to change your mind. BREATHE. I am just attempting to demonstrate there does seem to be a difference. It’s like saying, “I can’t do that” oppose to, “I won’t do that.” There is a difference. If you disagree with me, don’t be a “bully” about your disagreement.
“Bullying” seems a sanitizing way of saying, “mean.” Kids aren’t buying the “Anti-Bullying” campaign. We need to re-think what we are teaching. We want students to be respectful / nice – NOT MEAN.
I wrote a similar “article” about “stupid” being replaced by “poor choices.” “Billy made a poor choice in having unprotected sex with Eunice.” WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? Billy was STUPID for having unprotected sex with Eunice! Plain simple English. NO ONE WANTS TO BE STUPID! If we were to say to our children, “It is stupid to touch a hot stove. Do want to be stupid?” I would HOPE they would answer, “No. I want to be smart.” But, when we say, “Dear Perfect Angel (you are my child, after all). Touching the hot stove is a poor choice.” IT JUST DOESN’T HAVE THE IMPACT.
“You know, Charlie Student. When you call someone “retarded” that is mean.” Trust me. They stop using the word “retarded.” The “sane” student doesn’t want to be “mean.” Give it shot. Use the word “mean” once in a while and see how that works with your child / student. Children do not want to be mean. A “bully?” What do they see? A “bully” is a noun, while we are actually describing actions.
And here is another thing… the word “mean” turns into “evil.” “Evil” is another word we are weakening / cheapening. “Evil” needs to be at the level of what “awesome” was. Many people are saying, “Democrats are evil” “President Trump is evil.” STOP IT!! Democrats and/or Trump ARE NOT “evil.” SINCERELY. When you place the label “evil” on those you disagree with, YOU CHEAPEN THE WORD! I wouldn’t call a student “EVIL” – ever! I would bite my lip to the point of bleeding before I call one of my student’s “challenging” parents “evil.” Since 1989, I have had “evil” parents. I have written a CPS report or two in my career. SADLY. Those are EVIL parents. But, when Junior is being NOT COOL, I don’t call their parents “evil.”
The context of the word “evil” with any student would go back to the foundation of being “mean.” “Mean” is getting the student to the word / level of “evil.” I would “coach” the student that, “you (student) are being mean and being mean is leading you to being “evil.” So, I ask you (student) what can we do from getting you NOT TO THE LEVEL OF “evil?” The student will be blown away with that thought!
There are MEAN kids on campus. We need to get those MEAN kids to understand that their meanness will (not could – that’s weak language) turn into being EVIL ADULTS. And, when we ask them, as children, “Do you want to be an EVIL ADULT?” They will say, “NO.” BECAUSE, ALL HUMANS HAVE THE ABILITY not to be MEAN or EVIL. It is our (adults) responsibility to train child / student to be a good person, a person other than the “mean-person” and certainly not the “evil-person.”
LET’S GET AN “ANTI-MEAN” campaign going. “Mean” is the seed of “evil.” Let’s be better gardeners