Who knew “MOM” Would Be Such a Controversial Word?

I was raised by a single mother, Carleen.  My mom was one of two daughters of Commander Joseph A. Flynn and his wife, Anna Gordon Flynn.  On July 30, 1945, my mom’s father was killed in action.  He was the Executive Officer of the USS INDIANAPOLIS when it was sunk, and he died on the ship.  My mom was six years old when her father was killed.  I know … I know the tragic loss of her father would weigh on her until she passed away January 31, 2019.  My mom struggled with alcohol and weight.

Despite the struggles with alcohol, weight, difficult marriage ending in divorce, my mom was a very good mother.  She did her very best with me and my twin sisters.  She was very involved in raising us.  Brownies.  Girl Scouts.  Cub Scouts (Den Mother).  Boy Scouts.  Baseball.  She would play catch with me and throw some batting practice with me. OUTSTANDING BIRTHDAY PARTIES.  Did get us down to Disneyland (smile).

Yes.  There are thorns on the rose bush.  When she was drunk, it was unpleasant.  When she was almost killed walking across HIGHWAY ONE by a CHP car, that was unpleasant.  When she went to a month-long recovery session for her alcoholism, that was also, unpleasant.

But, with all the good, the bad, the ugly, I LOVE MY MOM!  I was / am proud to be her son.  She taught me a lot!  I miss my mom.

Moms – YOU ARE INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT AND WE (in this case, “we” means men) NEED TO STAND-UP FOR YOU.  I never thought I would have to write a “defense” for the title “mom.”  My goodness.  It saddens me that such an important role in our nation … mom … is now being morphed into “birthing person.”  Or, males can be moms, too.

Nope.  Not gonna do it.  Not gonna play along with this!

A nation, such as ours, needs to have a solid foundation for our children and the roles of “mom” and “dad” must… MUST … continue to be a part of that solid foundation.

There is an assault on the structure of the nuclear family, and I choose and accept the risk to speak-up in support of the nuclear family and specifically, MOM.

When we see our children full of anxiety and confusion, I know the answer to this sad reality.  Our parents (adults) are demonstrating anxiety and confusion.  We need to get back to understanding, when we (adults) choose our behavior, our children copy our choice(s) of behavior.  We are their model (I just did what I saw my mother do).  Much of the time, the child’s response to success and failure depends on how the child sees our (parents / adults) response to our success and failure.

Our children need both their mom and dad.  And that previous statement is coming from the son of a single mother.  I know.  OLD-FASHIONED.  Patriarchal.  Ultra-conservative.  Alt-Right.  Narrow-minded and on and on and on… with the name calling.  It’s 2022.  Name calling is in!

At the end of the article, I will leave you with some websites to checkout statistics that reflect the importance of moms.  The challenge of being a single mother.  Quotes about the importance of moms.

There is little doubt in my mind what we are seeing our children go through (increase of suicide attempts / drug use increase / gender confusion / etc.) is because we (universal use of the word ‘we’) have allowed a small percentage of people (a dog can control / heard a flock of sheep) to downplay the importance of mom AND dad, as if to say, anyone can be those roles.  To almost say, “there is no such thing as ‘mom’ and ‘dad.’  https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/pelosi-gender-ban-house/  (pst… “mostly false” means there is “some truth”)  Also know … “snopes” aint’ my go to.  But, I know some folks are going to say, “Hyperbole.  Balderdash. No one is saying, “stop saying ‘mom’ and ‘dad’.”  Here is another source https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/private-school-says-phrases-mom-dad-should-be-avoided-n1260695

Mom – you are more than a “birthing person.”  You bring so much to your child’s life.  For gosh sake, many of you can biologically feed your baby!  Your smile lights of you child’s life.  Your hugs are the best.

Please know as well … I strongly support the moms who adopt and / or foster care for children.  The role of the mom does not have to be biological connection to the child.  The role of the mom is to give the child a female side of a human being.  Yes.  I believe there are females and males.  Yes, I believe if I had had a father (male) help raise me, I would have been a different man.

So, in the end … Mom – OUR NATION NEEDS YOU!  You are so important.  I am proud of all the work my wife (Diana) did as a mother.  “Work?”  Yes!  WORK.  Being a mother is a hard work.  PJ and Katy could not be the super people they are if it was not for the WORK Diana did in raising them.

I am proud of my sister, my sister-in-law, my son’s mother-in-law, my daughter-in-law and all the women who choose to be moms for their children and please know … that commendation in no way is meant to shame anyoneIf you feel shamed by what I wrote, please know that is your choice to feel shame and NOT my intent.  My intent in writing this is to encourage women who are moms busting their butts to be great moms to know I love and respect them.  Continue to know the American Mom is neededHAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!